I don't know why I'm always the most inspired to write blog posts when I most need to be doing other things. I guess because these days the few moments of energy I actually get are spent doing not only the things I need to be doing, but also the things I enjoy but have been neglecting because I simply haven't had the motivation or strength to do them-like blogging for instance.
This will be brief, and most elements of this blog will likely be fleshed out in more detail as I further process and wrestle through them. But as a backdrop, this semester has been extremely dark for me. Emotionally, physically, spiritually, relationally, academically-it's all been a huge huge struggle for me this year.
But here's what I've been so surprised about: how the most unexpected people have just come out of the woodworks to come alongside me during this time and simply be there. The most unlikely of people have been the ones who have been the most encouraging to me, whether by simply sitting with me, rubbing my back, giving me chocolate or by asking me tough questions and helping me process through things, or helping me study (even if they aren't in my classes) or by coloring pictures and watching Harry Potter with me. I feel like I have nothing in return for them, and yet they haven't asked anything of me. I've felt guilty for not being the friend I know they need, and yet they still love me and they still color with me and they still rub my back.
Why God, why to bless me with such rich friendship and community?
I've been a hard person to be around this semester and I know that. My friends and family who knew me last semester say I'm not the same person...and I'm not. I know some of them wish they knew how to be there for me, and I wish I knew how they could be. In some cases the things that once glued us together are simply not my priorities anymore, so conversation seems forced and artificial. In other cases they simply do not have the energy themselves and the relationship has simply disintegrated. To them I say, "please, don't give up on me yet. I have changed, I'm struggling, but in some ways I'm even growing. And I'm sorry. I'm sorry I've put so much pressure on you to be there for me when I was not there for you. And I haven't given up on you either."
Sometimes I feel as though I'm barely hanging on by a thread, clinging with all that is in me not to let go. But then I remember, it's not my job to hang on. Try as I may, I can never hold on tight enough but someone has already hung in my place, asking that I simply let go cling to the one who has been holding me all along. Praise Jesus, because I've never had the greatest upper body strength.
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
You know it's been too long when it takes several attempts to remember the password. But upon request I'm back. I never actually intended to be gone so long, but I don't know, I guess I was waiting for something significant or profound. I had wanted to do a post-Uganda entry, or thoughts upon returning home, something of that nature. But after talking so sooo many people about it-family, friends, church, more family, more friends, etc.-it just felt like I was saying the same things over and over and therefore didn't want to write about it too.
In retrospect, this was dumb. I've had a lot of thoughts about coming back from a summer in Uganda and now I wish I could remember the progression in which all those thoughts took place. I quit journaling too. Also dumb.
I'm not feeling in a really in depth mood, but I miss it. Somedays more than others. Today is more. I also suck at communication, especially with those who became my family while I was there.
Apart from that, I'm about halfway done with another semester at Covenant. Being here wasn't exactly the glamorous plan I had for my life, but I guess sometimes God just has to slap us in the face, ruffle up our feathers and say "silly girl" for us to realize our plans were never really his in the first place. I think I'm still ruffled from it.
Covenant's a weird place to be. I'm realizing that more than ever this semester. I love it sure and I've grown a lot, but it is just bizarre.
Other things in my life right now- my puppy Maddie, who I adore; Sufjan Stevens, who I saw in concert recently; the OC, which I watch religiously; Donald Miller, who I read when I feel up to it; IC club, which I don't enjoy nearly as much as I used to but do anyways; bouldering, which I do every Monday to relieve stress; Fall Break, which I'm currently on; my parents, who live here now.
It's definitely an entirely different semester than any of the others. When I figure out what any of it means, I'll be sure to share that wisdom, but I'm still searching.
In retrospect, this was dumb. I've had a lot of thoughts about coming back from a summer in Uganda and now I wish I could remember the progression in which all those thoughts took place. I quit journaling too. Also dumb.
I'm not feeling in a really in depth mood, but I miss it. Somedays more than others. Today is more. I also suck at communication, especially with those who became my family while I was there.
Apart from that, I'm about halfway done with another semester at Covenant. Being here wasn't exactly the glamorous plan I had for my life, but I guess sometimes God just has to slap us in the face, ruffle up our feathers and say "silly girl" for us to realize our plans were never really his in the first place. I think I'm still ruffled from it.
Covenant's a weird place to be. I'm realizing that more than ever this semester. I love it sure and I've grown a lot, but it is just bizarre.
Other things in my life right now- my puppy Maddie, who I adore; Sufjan Stevens, who I saw in concert recently; the OC, which I watch religiously; Donald Miller, who I read when I feel up to it; IC club, which I don't enjoy nearly as much as I used to but do anyways; bouldering, which I do every Monday to relieve stress; Fall Break, which I'm currently on; my parents, who live here now.
It's definitely an entirely different semester than any of the others. When I figure out what any of it means, I'll be sure to share that wisdom, but I'm still searching.
Saturday, July 10, 2010
I'm procrastinating
Discouragement is looking at the contents of my room and wondering how in the name of all things I'm going to fit all of it into my suitcase. It's miserable. To make matters worse Laura is blasting Taylor Swift from the other room.
On a happy note, we made the most delicious mocha frappuccinos today.
On a happy note, we made the most delicious mocha frappuccinos today.
Sunday, July 4, 2010
The Countdown
Ever since we had 4 weeks remaining Laura has been counting down the days til we come home. I don't like it one bit. As much as I tried to be in denial though, I'm starting to feel like it's about that time. I think a lot of it had to do with saying goodbye to Auntie Jill and Uncle Joel yesterday. When they nailed down their departure date about 2 months ago I knew we'd only have a short time left once they had gone. We had a goodbye party for them yesterday (which was a nice excuse to kill and roast that dang pig that had been squealing like a little girl right outside our house) and they left this morning. I absolutely hated saying goodbye to them. Partly because I know it's just the first of many goodbyes in my near future, but mostly just because they are fabulous people that I love and adore and who have, in the least cheesy and non cliche way possible, changed me. I cried and became slightly less social, but I'm just trying to convince myself that I'll see them in the States when I go home.
The end of GETS is also a contributing factor to feeling like my time is almost up. We have a small ceremony for them today and they will most likely be going back to their homes on Wednesday. They have become my friends more than anything else, so saying goodbye to them won't be fun at all.
Though Laura has been counting down for ages now, I tried to refrain as long as I could, but even I can't help but think that I've only got 11 more days in Uganda, 8 more days in Mbarara, 3 more days with the GETS girls and 1 more team meeting. I'm trying to think of all the last minute things I need to do-people I need to see, pictures I need to take, gifts I need to buy, questions I need to ask..the list goes on. It's unbearable.
As hard as it will be to say goodbye though, I feel like it's about time to go home. I'm thankful for the wonderful family and friends I have that will care to hear about my stories and share in this part of my life with me.
The end of GETS is also a contributing factor to feeling like my time is almost up. We have a small ceremony for them today and they will most likely be going back to their homes on Wednesday. They have become my friends more than anything else, so saying goodbye to them won't be fun at all.
Though Laura has been counting down for ages now, I tried to refrain as long as I could, but even I can't help but think that I've only got 11 more days in Uganda, 8 more days in Mbarara, 3 more days with the GETS girls and 1 more team meeting. I'm trying to think of all the last minute things I need to do-people I need to see, pictures I need to take, gifts I need to buy, questions I need to ask..the list goes on. It's unbearable.
As hard as it will be to say goodbye though, I feel like it's about time to go home. I'm thankful for the wonderful family and friends I have that will care to hear about my stories and share in this part of my life with me.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Land of a Thousand Hills
I went to Rwanda earlier last week. My surrogate father Dale is the unit leader for the team here in Mbarara and the team in Kigali, the capital of Rwanda. He needed to pay the Rwandan team a visit, so Laura, Josh, Jason (another short termer who arrived recently) and I decided to come along.
We started our trip on Monday, left about an hour later than we had planned on, our van overheated about 2 hours in, and I used someone's pit latrine on the side of the road (I'm getting much better at that than when I first got here...I can almost get it all in the hole). We ate lunch in Kabale, a town at the bottom of Uganda, crossed the border and drove to Kigali. The drive was stunning. Beautifully cultivated hills spanned the country side. The contrast from Uganda to Rwanda was almost immediate. The roads are nicely paved and litter free. In fact, it's illegal to bring plastic bags into the country. I'm a fan of that.
We checked in at our hostel and went to a missionary couple's house for dinner. They're from New Zealand and the husband looks just like Mr. Bean (in fact, he often gets shouts and inquisitive looks from strangers and passerbys). After dinner and an amazing cup of tea, we watched a film entitled "As We Forgive". It's about the reconciliation after the genocide 16 years ago. This was a good preface for our activities the following day.
We started out our morning visiting the genocide museum. This provided us with a great deal of information and context through to view the culture. Prior to my visit, I knew little of of the conflict and what I did know was very general knowledge or came from the movie Hotel Rwanda. The museum was nicely laid out and did a great job explaining the events that led up the '94 genocide. We spent a total of 3 hours there, reading the info., watching shorts, hearing stories, etc. There was one room that had clothes of some of the victims hung up behind glass. I was shocked at how modern these clothes were (ie-GAP) and it struck me that this was so recent-in my lifetime even. It was powerful to say the least.
Certainly even more powerful was the church we went to visit next. The priest of the church had told his congregation that they could seek refuge there. 5,000 Tutsis crowded into the building, only to have the priest betray them. Grenades came in through windows and cracks and eventually the doors were broken down. Children were beaten against the walls and families were brutally attacked with pangas. The church is now a memorial-heaping piles of the victims' clothes cover the pews and outside are mass graves that you can walk down into. There you find rows and rows of skulls and piles of bones, often cracked or shattered-the remains of the victims. My heart was wrenched out. There's a visual that isn't likely to leave my mind any time soon.
Driving back into town, eyes filled with tears, I listened to Sigur Ros thinking of the overwhelming weight of sin in this world. I felt burdened by the lack of attention/aid from the international community and couldn't help but think of the situation in central Africa right now with the LRA. When all is said and done will we regret our lack of interest in this conflict? I'm praying not and the passage of the LRA Disarmament and Northern Uganda Recovery Act is a step in a positive direction.
Pray for Rwanda and those affected by the genocide. With a population of only 8 million in which 1 million had died, I'd be surprised if it were even possible to find a single person not affected in some way.
On a more cheerful note, the rest of our trip was nice and relaxing. Minus the fact that we ran out of gas on our way home and stopped by yet ANOTHER backyard pit latrine.
We started our trip on Monday, left about an hour later than we had planned on, our van overheated about 2 hours in, and I used someone's pit latrine on the side of the road (I'm getting much better at that than when I first got here...I can almost get it all in the hole). We ate lunch in Kabale, a town at the bottom of Uganda, crossed the border and drove to Kigali. The drive was stunning. Beautifully cultivated hills spanned the country side. The contrast from Uganda to Rwanda was almost immediate. The roads are nicely paved and litter free. In fact, it's illegal to bring plastic bags into the country. I'm a fan of that.
We checked in at our hostel and went to a missionary couple's house for dinner. They're from New Zealand and the husband looks just like Mr. Bean (in fact, he often gets shouts and inquisitive looks from strangers and passerbys). After dinner and an amazing cup of tea, we watched a film entitled "As We Forgive". It's about the reconciliation after the genocide 16 years ago. This was a good preface for our activities the following day.
We started out our morning visiting the genocide museum. This provided us with a great deal of information and context through to view the culture. Prior to my visit, I knew little of of the conflict and what I did know was very general knowledge or came from the movie Hotel Rwanda. The museum was nicely laid out and did a great job explaining the events that led up the '94 genocide. We spent a total of 3 hours there, reading the info., watching shorts, hearing stories, etc. There was one room that had clothes of some of the victims hung up behind glass. I was shocked at how modern these clothes were (ie-GAP) and it struck me that this was so recent-in my lifetime even. It was powerful to say the least.
Certainly even more powerful was the church we went to visit next. The priest of the church had told his congregation that they could seek refuge there. 5,000 Tutsis crowded into the building, only to have the priest betray them. Grenades came in through windows and cracks and eventually the doors were broken down. Children were beaten against the walls and families were brutally attacked with pangas. The church is now a memorial-heaping piles of the victims' clothes cover the pews and outside are mass graves that you can walk down into. There you find rows and rows of skulls and piles of bones, often cracked or shattered-the remains of the victims. My heart was wrenched out. There's a visual that isn't likely to leave my mind any time soon.
Driving back into town, eyes filled with tears, I listened to Sigur Ros thinking of the overwhelming weight of sin in this world. I felt burdened by the lack of attention/aid from the international community and couldn't help but think of the situation in central Africa right now with the LRA. When all is said and done will we regret our lack of interest in this conflict? I'm praying not and the passage of the LRA Disarmament and Northern Uganda Recovery Act is a step in a positive direction.
Pray for Rwanda and those affected by the genocide. With a population of only 8 million in which 1 million had died, I'd be surprised if it were even possible to find a single person not affected in some way.
On a more cheerful note, the rest of our trip was nice and relaxing. Minus the fact that we ran out of gas on our way home and stopped by yet ANOTHER backyard pit latrine.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
World Cup, Bugs, Muchomo,
Heads up: this post is very hodgepodge, but I wanted to take advantage of the internet opportunity.
There's something really exciting about watching the World Cup while it's taking place on this very continent. I've never been one to really care about soccer, except when Covenant plays (We are the Scots and we come from the Mountain!) and even then I'd only really attend the big games. But I've rather enjoyed watching various games here. I've gotten to experience several ambiances-Africans watching South Africa, Brits watching England, Germans watching Germany and Americans watching the US. It's been fun to be in a room with so many different countries represented for the various matches.
On an unrelated note, I've been getting these mysterious bug bites on my right arm. I've gotten them on 4 separate occasions-always in patches of at least 10-20 bites. We've ruled out mosquitoes, fleas, and bed bugs. We started to realize that they always showed up after I sat in the wicker chairs at Dale and Kathy's. They knew that bugs sometimes reside in there and that they don't like varnish so after the fist 2 attacks we got the couch and 2 chairs varnished. But the other night, after watching Night at the Museum 2, I found a good 13 more and last night I got even more while I was reading. If the bites were indeed coming from the chairs, then I couldn't figure out why I was the only one out of the multitudes of people that come through this house to get bitten. When I got home today Micah told me that they found the bugs living in the chair and they "doomed" them. Apparently he and Kathy abandoned homeschooling and get to the bottom of this. They tipped over one of the chairs and shook and shook and shook. Hundreds of little black bugs and spiders and larva and dust came tumbling out. Most of the bugs had died thanks to the varnish, but some were still living. They shook all the furniture and sprayed gallons of Doom on them. Oh the joys of life here.
On a less gross and more cheerful note, we had muchomo for dinner and s'mores for dessert. We have a fire pit in our front yard and the boys love to roast things on it. (This is where they took care of that rooster that used to crow outside our window.) So tonight they roasted beef, which may have been one of the best things I've eaten yet and then we went through 2 bags of marshmallows making s'mores. Less sarcastically, oh the joys of life here.
Tomorrow I'll be going to Ntare School (where President Mussevini attended) to help the girls in their computer skills. Mike will be teaching his hermeneutics class, which is fabulous and then Laura, Emily (a new arrival), and I will be "hosting" the All Saints youth group, which could possibly mean "leading/teaching" the youth group. Only time will tell.
There's something really exciting about watching the World Cup while it's taking place on this very continent. I've never been one to really care about soccer, except when Covenant plays (We are the Scots and we come from the Mountain!) and even then I'd only really attend the big games. But I've rather enjoyed watching various games here. I've gotten to experience several ambiances-Africans watching South Africa, Brits watching England, Germans watching Germany and Americans watching the US. It's been fun to be in a room with so many different countries represented for the various matches.
On an unrelated note, I've been getting these mysterious bug bites on my right arm. I've gotten them on 4 separate occasions-always in patches of at least 10-20 bites. We've ruled out mosquitoes, fleas, and bed bugs. We started to realize that they always showed up after I sat in the wicker chairs at Dale and Kathy's. They knew that bugs sometimes reside in there and that they don't like varnish so after the fist 2 attacks we got the couch and 2 chairs varnished. But the other night, after watching Night at the Museum 2, I found a good 13 more and last night I got even more while I was reading. If the bites were indeed coming from the chairs, then I couldn't figure out why I was the only one out of the multitudes of people that come through this house to get bitten. When I got home today Micah told me that they found the bugs living in the chair and they "doomed" them. Apparently he and Kathy abandoned homeschooling and get to the bottom of this. They tipped over one of the chairs and shook and shook and shook. Hundreds of little black bugs and spiders and larva and dust came tumbling out. Most of the bugs had died thanks to the varnish, but some were still living. They shook all the furniture and sprayed gallons of Doom on them. Oh the joys of life here.
On a less gross and more cheerful note, we had muchomo for dinner and s'mores for dessert. We have a fire pit in our front yard and the boys love to roast things on it. (This is where they took care of that rooster that used to crow outside our window.) So tonight they roasted beef, which may have been one of the best things I've eaten yet and then we went through 2 bags of marshmallows making s'mores. Less sarcastically, oh the joys of life here.
Tomorrow I'll be going to Ntare School (where President Mussevini attended) to help the girls in their computer skills. Mike will be teaching his hermeneutics class, which is fabulous and then Laura, Emily (a new arrival), and I will be "hosting" the All Saints youth group, which could possibly mean "leading/teaching" the youth group. Only time will tell.
Monday, June 21, 2010
African Lady
I've acquired a new name with the GETS girls-African lady.
Why?
Because someday I should be an African..at least that's what they say. They say that I've done a good job engaging the culture and I'm willing to try new things. I think they are referring to the fact that I've had to basin bathe for the last 2 weeks, that I put up with things like rats (did I tell you I found a dead one in my purse last week?!), and that I attempt the language (though my words are limited and often mispronounced). I also "forget" to take/wear my boda helmet, I'll sleep without a net if I have a bed to myself and I eat mangos from the tree. (I can hear my mother gasping in horror right now-don't worry ma, I'm still being safe!)
They also said that I joke like an Ugandan. They tried to give me the name African queen, but I told them I wasn't fit for a queen because I say words like ekibunu (which I thought just meant "butt", but apparently has a stronger, more offensive meaning..oops) and I sometimes wear trousers.
I've loved getting to know these girls and laughing with them. We've laughed and laughed, to the point that the muzee in the compound have often asked if they were safe. They were.
The program ends soon and it will be sad to see them go, but I'm thankful for the time I've had with them so far.
Why?
Because someday I should be an African..at least that's what they say. They say that I've done a good job engaging the culture and I'm willing to try new things. I think they are referring to the fact that I've had to basin bathe for the last 2 weeks, that I put up with things like rats (did I tell you I found a dead one in my purse last week?!), and that I attempt the language (though my words are limited and often mispronounced). I also "forget" to take/wear my boda helmet, I'll sleep without a net if I have a bed to myself and I eat mangos from the tree. (I can hear my mother gasping in horror right now-don't worry ma, I'm still being safe!)
They also said that I joke like an Ugandan. They tried to give me the name African queen, but I told them I wasn't fit for a queen because I say words like ekibunu (which I thought just meant "butt", but apparently has a stronger, more offensive meaning..oops) and I sometimes wear trousers.
I've loved getting to know these girls and laughing with them. We've laughed and laughed, to the point that the muzee in the compound have often asked if they were safe. They were.
The program ends soon and it will be sad to see them go, but I'm thankful for the time I've had with them so far.
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Everyday...more or less
I've been getting complaints that I'm not sharing enough of my day to day activities. Keep in mind that everyday is very different. But I'll try to do a better job at sharing what life here for me actually looks like.
I moved into the GETS (Girls Empowered to Serve) home last Monday. Since that is my primary area of ministry, we felt like it would be a good thing for me to spend more time with the girls. GETS is a discipleship program for young women who have completed secondary school and in the waiting period before university. They typically have different Bible studies or book studies and they are taught life skills as well as domestic skills (cooking, cleaning, hosting, etc.)
I am leading a class Wednesday afternoons going through a book called Obeying Jesus. I'm not a huge fan of the book itself, but it has definitely spurred on some excellent conversation and questions. Apart from that, I take each girl into town once a week individually to give them a chance to get away from the home for a few hours. So far it's been a great time to just hang out casually and get to know them each better. So a lot of time is spent getting to know the girls better. Mike, Susan, Mable and special guests lead lessons that I try to attend when I can.
When I'm not at the house or with the girls, I'm either at Matt and Crystal's or with my team. Crystal is pregnant and on bed rest for a few weeks and has 2 toddler boys running around the house. So I go over on Tuesdays (and whenever I get an emergency call to come) to hang out with the boys and help around the house. It's been a neat unexpected surprise to be able to encourage her in this time. Yesterday Laura and I spent a good part of our day cooking lasagna and tuna casserole to freeze so that they have some easy meals after the baby is born and last Saturday we had a movie night with her. I've loved having conversations with Crystal and getting to know her better. She's got such a beautiful spirit!
It's hard to really say exactly what else I do here. I do a lot of talking and a lot of listening and a lot of observing. I do a lot hanging out and getting to know people. I've done a few dance parties and movie nights. I've watched a few World Cup games (which is quite exciting since we're on the same continent as the tournament and since we have Brits on the team whose whole life is "football"). I've eaten a lot and drunk tons of African tea. I've been encouraged a lot and hopefully encouraged a lot. People being people with people-that's what I've been doing here. I've learned a lot, grown a lot, been challenged a lot.
We have 5 weeks left from yesterday and honestly, I'm sad to think that our time here is halfway over. I keep waiting for things to get unbearable, to get so frustrated that I want to go home...but it just hasn't happened yet. Sure I've had bad days here, but I can count them on 2 fingers. And of course I've been frustrated, but even on my worst days nothing has made me feel like I'm not supposed to be here, nothing has made me throw my hands up and say "enough!" Maybe it's because of my family here who constantly helps me process through things and encourages me. Maybe it's because the overwhelming love and support from my family and friends back home. Maybe it's because I know God has me here for a plan and purpose. I think it's all three. I'm so grateful for that.
I moved into the GETS (Girls Empowered to Serve) home last Monday. Since that is my primary area of ministry, we felt like it would be a good thing for me to spend more time with the girls. GETS is a discipleship program for young women who have completed secondary school and in the waiting period before university. They typically have different Bible studies or book studies and they are taught life skills as well as domestic skills (cooking, cleaning, hosting, etc.)
I am leading a class Wednesday afternoons going through a book called Obeying Jesus. I'm not a huge fan of the book itself, but it has definitely spurred on some excellent conversation and questions. Apart from that, I take each girl into town once a week individually to give them a chance to get away from the home for a few hours. So far it's been a great time to just hang out casually and get to know them each better. So a lot of time is spent getting to know the girls better. Mike, Susan, Mable and special guests lead lessons that I try to attend when I can.
When I'm not at the house or with the girls, I'm either at Matt and Crystal's or with my team. Crystal is pregnant and on bed rest for a few weeks and has 2 toddler boys running around the house. So I go over on Tuesdays (and whenever I get an emergency call to come) to hang out with the boys and help around the house. It's been a neat unexpected surprise to be able to encourage her in this time. Yesterday Laura and I spent a good part of our day cooking lasagna and tuna casserole to freeze so that they have some easy meals after the baby is born and last Saturday we had a movie night with her. I've loved having conversations with Crystal and getting to know her better. She's got such a beautiful spirit!
It's hard to really say exactly what else I do here. I do a lot of talking and a lot of listening and a lot of observing. I do a lot hanging out and getting to know people. I've done a few dance parties and movie nights. I've watched a few World Cup games (which is quite exciting since we're on the same continent as the tournament and since we have Brits on the team whose whole life is "football"). I've eaten a lot and drunk tons of African tea. I've been encouraged a lot and hopefully encouraged a lot. People being people with people-that's what I've been doing here. I've learned a lot, grown a lot, been challenged a lot.
We have 5 weeks left from yesterday and honestly, I'm sad to think that our time here is halfway over. I keep waiting for things to get unbearable, to get so frustrated that I want to go home...but it just hasn't happened yet. Sure I've had bad days here, but I can count them on 2 fingers. And of course I've been frustrated, but even on my worst days nothing has made me feel like I'm not supposed to be here, nothing has made me throw my hands up and say "enough!" Maybe it's because of my family here who constantly helps me process through things and encourages me. Maybe it's because the overwhelming love and support from my family and friends back home. Maybe it's because I know God has me here for a plan and purpose. I think it's all three. I'm so grateful for that.
Monday, June 7, 2010
Meet the Team
This post has been saved in my drafts for about 3 weeks. I knew I wanted to introduce the team, but I didn't want to until I knew them better. So here are some of the people that I've been spending all my time with:
Papa Dale and Momma Kathy
are my host parents. Dale is the team leader for the team here. They have 3 boys Micah, Ben and Zach. The more time I spend at their home the more I admire them. They've already had a ton on their plate without having to worry about our team, but their love and patience has been amazing. I've had pretty lengthy conversations with at least one of them almost every singe night that I've been here. It's been a blast living with them and being welcomed into this family. My little brothers are wild and crazy. We've had several sword fights (I almost always lose) and they have twice now, done us girls a favor by killing and cooking the roosters that would crow right outside our window.
Mike and Susan
Mike focuses on pastoral training. Every time he speaks, I love to listen. He's a wellspring of knowledge and has lots to offer. I've learned so much from him already and can't wait to hear more. Susan is one of the sweetest, most genuine ladies. She is leading a study with the GETS girls that seems to be very helpful for them.
Uncle Joel and Auntie Jill
They quickly became some of my favorite people, despite all the times they pick on me (and I'm not just saying that because I know they'll read this). They are definitely some of the most real, honest, open, casual people I've met in a long, long time. Joel eats napkins-literally. It's a condition. We're praying for him. Nurse Jill is the go-to in te unhappy event I ever get mango flies. (shudder) They've got 2 kids-Dara and Dade-who, for whatever reason, think I'm pretty cool. I'm their favorite, but I'm not supposed to tell anyone.
Zillah
I'm learning loads of new vocabulary from this Brit. She works at the hospital as a physiotherapist. She's had some crazy adventures, including backpacking to northern Uganda with just a change of clothes, hitchhiking in matoke trucks, riding ostriches and climbing Mt. Everest twice...barefoot. When she's not trying to sell me off as a way to fundraiser, she can be pretty fun.
Matt and Crystal
They are very strong people. They are here with Juna Amagara Ministries and started ABIDE, a ministry for young men who are in break between secondary school and university. It's an intensive discipleship program with outreaches to different villages every weekend. Matt and Crystal also foster abandoned babies. Crystal is 7+ months pregnant and has 2 toddler boys and until recently fostered a 3 mo. old baby who was orphaned at birth. They are a beautiful family with gigantic hears.
Seb
Also a Brit, also tries to sell me off, also teaches me new vocab. He's definitely got a sense of humor that can have even the most boring people in stitches/tears. (I've never cried so many times from laughing at the most inappropriate times then when he's around, especially when he and Joel team up.) He works with ABIDE and is here on a 1 year assignment, but has just decided to come back long term to work with teenagers.
Travis
Also works with ABIDE. Travis is here for 6 months. He's pretty much redeemed my view of Canada that Josh has lost. I think we actually became friends when I decided that he, Seb and Dale needed some female company in their car at Queen Elizabeth. We are now at the point where I feel like I can tell him when Quest (or any other animal) drinks from his mug. Once ABIDE is over he'll either be working in Tanzania or Sudan for his last month.
Lou
She just left yesterday to head back to the UK. She worked at the hospital in the lab and also led a session at GETS (that I will be finishing out). She probably had the best fashion of anyone in Mbarara. She is very independent and very adventurous.
Tob
I didn't actually believe that he existed until just recently. he was sick for the first 2 weeks that we were here. He's a medical student from Germany that was working in the hospital but will actually be going back home soon. Once I started to get to know him a bit, I've realized that he is actually very funny.
Words could not descibe what this team means to me. They have reshaped my idea of missions-it's not all evangelism and crusades, it's people being people with people. It's messy and hard, but it can definitely be fun too. They have poured themselves into me and opened their homes. I am so thankful for their hearts, hospitality, honesty and humor. I've literally been in tears at the profound way that I've been shown the gospel by them. They have encouraged and challenged me in ways that I'm sure they don't even realize. I am so thankful for my family here.
Papa Dale and Momma Kathy
are my host parents. Dale is the team leader for the team here. They have 3 boys Micah, Ben and Zach. The more time I spend at their home the more I admire them. They've already had a ton on their plate without having to worry about our team, but their love and patience has been amazing. I've had pretty lengthy conversations with at least one of them almost every singe night that I've been here. It's been a blast living with them and being welcomed into this family. My little brothers are wild and crazy. We've had several sword fights (I almost always lose) and they have twice now, done us girls a favor by killing and cooking the roosters that would crow right outside our window.
Mike and Susan
Mike focuses on pastoral training. Every time he speaks, I love to listen. He's a wellspring of knowledge and has lots to offer. I've learned so much from him already and can't wait to hear more. Susan is one of the sweetest, most genuine ladies. She is leading a study with the GETS girls that seems to be very helpful for them.
Uncle Joel and Auntie Jill
They quickly became some of my favorite people, despite all the times they pick on me (and I'm not just saying that because I know they'll read this). They are definitely some of the most real, honest, open, casual people I've met in a long, long time. Joel eats napkins-literally. It's a condition. We're praying for him. Nurse Jill is the go-to in te unhappy event I ever get mango flies. (shudder) They've got 2 kids-Dara and Dade-who, for whatever reason, think I'm pretty cool. I'm their favorite, but I'm not supposed to tell anyone.
Zillah
I'm learning loads of new vocabulary from this Brit. She works at the hospital as a physiotherapist. She's had some crazy adventures, including backpacking to northern Uganda with just a change of clothes, hitchhiking in matoke trucks, riding ostriches and climbing Mt. Everest twice...barefoot. When she's not trying to sell me off as a way to fundraiser, she can be pretty fun.
Matt and Crystal
They are very strong people. They are here with Juna Amagara Ministries and started ABIDE, a ministry for young men who are in break between secondary school and university. It's an intensive discipleship program with outreaches to different villages every weekend. Matt and Crystal also foster abandoned babies. Crystal is 7+ months pregnant and has 2 toddler boys and until recently fostered a 3 mo. old baby who was orphaned at birth. They are a beautiful family with gigantic hears.
Seb
Also a Brit, also tries to sell me off, also teaches me new vocab. He's definitely got a sense of humor that can have even the most boring people in stitches/tears. (I've never cried so many times from laughing at the most inappropriate times then when he's around, especially when he and Joel team up.) He works with ABIDE and is here on a 1 year assignment, but has just decided to come back long term to work with teenagers.
Travis
Also works with ABIDE. Travis is here for 6 months. He's pretty much redeemed my view of Canada that Josh has lost. I think we actually became friends when I decided that he, Seb and Dale needed some female company in their car at Queen Elizabeth. We are now at the point where I feel like I can tell him when Quest (or any other animal) drinks from his mug. Once ABIDE is over he'll either be working in Tanzania or Sudan for his last month.
Lou
She just left yesterday to head back to the UK. She worked at the hospital in the lab and also led a session at GETS (that I will be finishing out). She probably had the best fashion of anyone in Mbarara. She is very independent and very adventurous.
Tob
I didn't actually believe that he existed until just recently. he was sick for the first 2 weeks that we were here. He's a medical student from Germany that was working in the hospital but will actually be going back home soon. Once I started to get to know him a bit, I've realized that he is actually very funny.
Words could not descibe what this team means to me. They have reshaped my idea of missions-it's not all evangelism and crusades, it's people being people with people. It's messy and hard, but it can definitely be fun too. They have poured themselves into me and opened their homes. I am so thankful for their hearts, hospitality, honesty and humor. I've literally been in tears at the profound way that I've been shown the gospel by them. They have encouraged and challenged me in ways that I'm sure they don't even realize. I am so thankful for my family here.
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Rodney
Turns out Rodney does indeed exist. Who would've thought? My little brothers found 3 dead mice throughout the house and it turns out the rodent in our bedroom was just a mouse-Henry. I haven't seen anymore mice since then, but I doubt they've all gone. As for Rodney, I definitely saw him scampering across our dining room. We tried to barricade him in with plastic tubs, but he took refuge behind the china cabinet. This was on Thursday.
Friday night Kathy let out the most epic scream from the kitchen. Dale, distantly followed by Laura and I, ran to come help-Laura brought her panga and I took up a plastic dagger I found on the floor _the joys of having. We meant business. Somehow Rodney was cornered and forced under the door that leads outside to the generator. Dale shoved towels in the crack so he can't get back in. It really was a bit anti-climactic- especially after hearing about how at one point Ruth single-handedly dominated 6 mice in the pantry- but I'm thankful that he's gone, at least for the time being.
Friday night Kathy let out the most epic scream from the kitchen. Dale, distantly followed by Laura and I, ran to come help-Laura brought her panga and I took up a plastic dagger I found on the floor _the joys of having. We meant business. Somehow Rodney was cornered and forced under the door that leads outside to the generator. Dale shoved towels in the crack so he can't get back in. It really was a bit anti-climactic- especially after hearing about how at one point Ruth single-handedly dominated 6 mice in the pantry- but I'm thankful that he's gone, at least for the time being.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
The Girl Who Cried Rat
We've had a rat (Rodney) in our house for the last week or so. (Or at least that's when it's existence was made known to me.) Two days ago Christina saw Rodney in the kitchen, scrounging for food. She squealed, and the "peanut butter" was put out. I didn't give much thought to Rodney since then until last night when Christina spotted him in our room running from under our desk to under my bed. This was around dinner time, so the boys checked it out and called our room clear. We went about the evening as normal, ate dinner, did the dishes, read, journaled, etc. We started to get ready for bed when Christina let out another yelp. She had seen something run from near our bathroom to behind our laundry basket. At this point in time I was seriously considering that Christina was hallucinating, since she had been the only one to see Rodney in the whole house. We had Daddy Dale come check things out, and sure enough, Rodney was no where to be found. Once again, I dismissed it and stared to brush my teeth. Suddenly I heard Christina scream again and Laura gasp and I knew it must be real this time. I found myself standing on top of the toilet seat, as I was very near where he had been spotted. Dale came back in and checked things out, but Rodney had seemingly nestled himself behind a plastic bin in our closet. We moved the peanut butter into our room, should Rodney fancy a midnight snack. I'm still a bit iffy of Rodney's existence, since I still have yet to see him and I'm thinking this scenario seems an awfully lot like the boy who cried wolf. Sadly, when he's really there, I'm doubtful I'll believe anyone. Only time will tell.
Monday, May 17, 2010
A Typical Day in Uganda
does not exist. I'm convinced that nothing we have done since we've been here is "normal", at least in the eyes of most Westerners. I'm finding that everyday is an adventure, quite literally.
Of course getting here was quite the adventure-a lot of flying, a lot of layovers, a lot of driving and little sleep. Since arriving in Mbarara on Wednesday I have eaten a grasshopper, milked a cow, cut a banana leaf with a panga and shucked beans. I experienced an earthquake the other night (don't worry, don't worry-it did zero damage: just rattled the windows a bit, but we didn't even feel it). It's rained everyday we've been here, which means a lot of mud. Everday we drive reminds me of being in the desert of New Mexico, only there we would offroad for fun, here it is a part of life. I've also learned far more than I could ever share.
Since the first day we've arrived, we have been in intensive training-meeting the team and learning their roles, learning the culture, talking about evangelism in ways that are appropriate with the culture, and diving into the language with 1.5 hour sessions everyday.
I am convinced that this is not just another STM (short term mission) trip. I am so thankful and pleased with the emphasis on learning and studying above any "doing". The long-term team here is fabulous and care for us so much. I've rarely felt hospitality like this.
I would share a typical day here with you, but so far I have not had one.
Of course getting here was quite the adventure-a lot of flying, a lot of layovers, a lot of driving and little sleep. Since arriving in Mbarara on Wednesday I have eaten a grasshopper, milked a cow, cut a banana leaf with a panga and shucked beans. I experienced an earthquake the other night (don't worry, don't worry-it did zero damage: just rattled the windows a bit, but we didn't even feel it). It's rained everyday we've been here, which means a lot of mud. Everday we drive reminds me of being in the desert of New Mexico, only there we would offroad for fun, here it is a part of life. I've also learned far more than I could ever share.
Since the first day we've arrived, we have been in intensive training-meeting the team and learning their roles, learning the culture, talking about evangelism in ways that are appropriate with the culture, and diving into the language with 1.5 hour sessions everyday.
I am convinced that this is not just another STM (short term mission) trip. I am so thankful and pleased with the emphasis on learning and studying above any "doing". The long-term team here is fabulous and care for us so much. I've rarely felt hospitality like this.
I would share a typical day here with you, but so far I have not had one.
Monday, May 10, 2010
uganda time (for real this time.)
Sitting in Detroit waiting to board the plane to amsterdam. From there we head to Entebbe, then to Kampala for the night at Dr. K's then to Mbarara. Once in Mbarara we dive into intensive training-language, culture, etc. Then we'll have a job fair to see where we'd like to be placed for the summer.
In Uganda the local time is 1250 am. We're all feeling the effects of little sleep. Some are sleeping on the floor, others are in their own little world and others are slap happy, giggling hysterically.
I don't have much else at the moment. Were boarding now. I'm looking forward to sleeping on this stretch of the trip and getting further into the Screwtape Letters.
In Uganda the local time is 1250 am. We're all feeling the effects of little sleep. Some are sleeping on the floor, others are in their own little world and others are slap happy, giggling hysterically.
I don't have much else at the moment. Were boarding now. I'm looking forward to sleeping on this stretch of the trip and getting further into the Screwtape Letters.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Uganda Time.
In just 3.5 hours I will be waking up to go to the airport. It's crazy to think that it's finally happening. I've been preparing for this trip for months now and I can't believe it's nearly here. I'm so excited to see what challenges, adventures and joys lie ahead of me these next 10 weeks. I will definitely be posting as I get the opportunity.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Downsizing
Moving out always makes me realize how much I have. I'm the last one left in my room (tear) but there's still so much clutter.
So I've decided to downsize. By half.
It's just stuff after all isn't it? Clothes I never wear, movies I never watch, a guitar I never play, books I've already read. Stuff. Crap, really.
I don't know when people decided we needed more stuff to make us happy. I've been finding that the more I have, the more stressed out I get-more things to lose, more to be responsible for, more to find places for. I just don't need it.
So my goal is to get rid of half of it. Now that I have the room to myself, I think I'm going to take this time to take inventory of what I have and get rid of it. I want to be able to fit everything in the 3 bins I'm allowed to store at Covenant and the 2 suitcases I have. (Obviously things like the guitar, tv dinner table, tv stand, the carpet and my chair won't fit in those bins, but everything else should be able to.)
We'll see how it goes. I know it's going to be a big project and it will probably be difficult, but I think it needs to happen.
So I've decided to downsize. By half.
It's just stuff after all isn't it? Clothes I never wear, movies I never watch, a guitar I never play, books I've already read. Stuff. Crap, really.
I don't know when people decided we needed more stuff to make us happy. I've been finding that the more I have, the more stressed out I get-more things to lose, more to be responsible for, more to find places for. I just don't need it.
So my goal is to get rid of half of it. Now that I have the room to myself, I think I'm going to take this time to take inventory of what I have and get rid of it. I want to be able to fit everything in the 3 bins I'm allowed to store at Covenant and the 2 suitcases I have. (Obviously things like the guitar, tv dinner table, tv stand, the carpet and my chair won't fit in those bins, but everything else should be able to.)
We'll see how it goes. I know it's going to be a big project and it will probably be difficult, but I think it needs to happen.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Creation, Fall, Redemption
Here at Covenant, everywhere we turn we hear about the Creation, Fall, Redemption framework. It's next to impossible to draw connections between at least one of the aspects and everyday life and almost all teachers, regardless of the field, assign papers or reading relating to it.
Because it's drilled into us so much, we like to have fun with it. For example, after the controversial cremation chapel talk, Dr. Kapic appeared in the faculty quote of the week saying “Creation, Fall, Redemption, Consummation. HA! Things around here now are more like: Cremation, Fall, Redemption, Constipation.”
In less than 2 weeks I've included this framework in 3 papers, so I draw connections almost effortlessly. I'll just share one that my life demonstrated today:
Creation- me. I was born 20 years ago today.
Fall- Stats. I really pooped up on my Statistics final.
Redemption- CHOW. I pretty much dominated my Cultural Heritage of the West final.
This is definitely one of those things that makes Covenant extra nerdy isn't it?
Because it's drilled into us so much, we like to have fun with it. For example, after the controversial cremation chapel talk, Dr. Kapic appeared in the faculty quote of the week saying “Creation, Fall, Redemption, Consummation. HA! Things around here now are more like: Cremation, Fall, Redemption, Constipation.”
In less than 2 weeks I've included this framework in 3 papers, so I draw connections almost effortlessly. I'll just share one that my life demonstrated today:
Creation- me. I was born 20 years ago today.
Fall- Stats. I really pooped up on my Statistics final.
Redemption- CHOW. I pretty much dominated my Cultural Heritage of the West final.
This is definitely one of those things that makes Covenant extra nerdy isn't it?
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Currently:
Watching the sunrise, listening to Explosions in the Sky and writing a paper about something I love--life.is.beautiful.
Saturday, May 1, 2010
I recommend
Sigur Rós - Góðan Daginn
I've been listening to Sigur Ros a lot lately-particularly this song. Perfect for studying and writing papers.Monday, April 26, 2010
Summertime
I had 3 options for this summer:
1. Go Home and take summer classes and work. Then when my parents were ready to move, I'd be available to help.
2. Go to Bolivia (or some Spanish speaking country) to take some Spanish classes and finish up my minor. I liked the idea of Bolivia because there's an non-profit that was started by a Covenant family that does development work there.
3. Go to Uganda for either 4 or 10 weeks as part of "Covenant Connect," a program designed to mentor Covenant students who are interested in long-term missions.
Uganda was the least likely of the three, just because I wouldn't make any money or take any of the classes that I needed. I had actually decided that going home was the best option, but as soon as I made that decision, it seemed like everything was pointing me to Uganda. I remember eating lunch with my parents and discussing these 3 options. They looked at me and and said, "You're going to Africa this summer aren't you." I responded, "Well, yeah, I think I am." After that, more and more small things confirmed the decision. It's hard to say exactly why I felt like I was supposed to go and I'm still not entirely certain of the full purpose, but I know that God has a beautiful plan for this trip.
My team of 8 has been meeting every Sunday for the past 2.5 months. We've even had 2 3-hour sessions with Dr. K. I feel so much more prepared for this trip than when I went in 2007, though I know I'm far from fully understanding the culture and norms. Especially after reading chapter 7 of When Helping Hurts, I'm glad for the general structure of this trip and the preparation leading up to it. The purpose of the trip is for the long-term missionaries in Mbarara to mentor and disciple us, knowing that long-term missions may be something we are called to do vocationally. I'm excited to get to learn and be mentored by them, as well as the people I interact with daily.
People keep asking me if this trip will be safe. I don't have the answer to that. What I do know is that Christians were never called to be "safe" but rather, we were called into a more dangerous life-a life that guarantees persecution and sometimes death. It's funny how we think that America is so safe in the first place. We are bombarded with tv and consumerism and materialism-how does that size up?
My friend Lauranne is spending a few months in Gulu, Uganda. I found a picture with this quote on her trip blog, and I think it speaks volumes into my trip as well. "A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not why ships are built."
Of course I don't want to be stupid and reckless on this trip, but I understand that a Christian's life was never meant to be safe. I know that the Enemy does not want this trip to happen-in fact, we have already had so many obstacles in even getting there. I know that he will wear and tear on us, so please pray for strength and endurance for my teammates and I. Pray that we will be quick to listen and slow to speak; quick to forgive and slow to judge. Pray that we will love well-each other and those we encounter on a daily basis. Pray for patience and understanding as we enter into a culture entirely different from our own. Pray that we will not be arrogant, but humble and sensitive. There is so, so much more!
I'm excited to spend the summer sharing the love of Christ to children that have never known it. I'm excited to tell these disabled youth that they are made in the image of God and that they are beautiful. I'm excited to learn from them and build relationships with them. I'm excited to get to know my teammates even further. I'm excited to learn from the missionaries. I'm excited to embrace the beautiful country of Uganda and live out this beautiful story that is unfolding in my life.
God is good.
1. Go Home and take summer classes and work. Then when my parents were ready to move, I'd be available to help.
2. Go to Bolivia (or some Spanish speaking country) to take some Spanish classes and finish up my minor. I liked the idea of Bolivia because there's an non-profit that was started by a Covenant family that does development work there.
3. Go to Uganda for either 4 or 10 weeks as part of "Covenant Connect," a program designed to mentor Covenant students who are interested in long-term missions.
Uganda was the least likely of the three, just because I wouldn't make any money or take any of the classes that I needed. I had actually decided that going home was the best option, but as soon as I made that decision, it seemed like everything was pointing me to Uganda. I remember eating lunch with my parents and discussing these 3 options. They looked at me and and said, "You're going to Africa this summer aren't you." I responded, "Well, yeah, I think I am." After that, more and more small things confirmed the decision. It's hard to say exactly why I felt like I was supposed to go and I'm still not entirely certain of the full purpose, but I know that God has a beautiful plan for this trip.
My team of 8 has been meeting every Sunday for the past 2.5 months. We've even had 2 3-hour sessions with Dr. K. I feel so much more prepared for this trip than when I went in 2007, though I know I'm far from fully understanding the culture and norms. Especially after reading chapter 7 of When Helping Hurts, I'm glad for the general structure of this trip and the preparation leading up to it. The purpose of the trip is for the long-term missionaries in Mbarara to mentor and disciple us, knowing that long-term missions may be something we are called to do vocationally. I'm excited to get to learn and be mentored by them, as well as the people I interact with daily.
People keep asking me if this trip will be safe. I don't have the answer to that. What I do know is that Christians were never called to be "safe" but rather, we were called into a more dangerous life-a life that guarantees persecution and sometimes death. It's funny how we think that America is so safe in the first place. We are bombarded with tv and consumerism and materialism-how does that size up?
My friend Lauranne is spending a few months in Gulu, Uganda. I found a picture with this quote on her trip blog, and I think it speaks volumes into my trip as well. "A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not why ships are built."
Of course I don't want to be stupid and reckless on this trip, but I understand that a Christian's life was never meant to be safe. I know that the Enemy does not want this trip to happen-in fact, we have already had so many obstacles in even getting there. I know that he will wear and tear on us, so please pray for strength and endurance for my teammates and I. Pray that we will be quick to listen and slow to speak; quick to forgive and slow to judge. Pray that we will love well-each other and those we encounter on a daily basis. Pray for patience and understanding as we enter into a culture entirely different from our own. Pray that we will not be arrogant, but humble and sensitive. There is so, so much more!
I'm excited to spend the summer sharing the love of Christ to children that have never known it. I'm excited to tell these disabled youth that they are made in the image of God and that they are beautiful. I'm excited to learn from them and build relationships with them. I'm excited to get to know my teammates even further. I'm excited to learn from the missionaries. I'm excited to embrace the beautiful country of Uganda and live out this beautiful story that is unfolding in my life.
God is good.
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